Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Remember to look for the LIGHT....

My three children are the light of my life.  It doesn't matter that they are 25, 16 and 12...they will always be my babies.  I carried them, nuzzled them, nursed them, loved them from the first moment I laid eyes on them.  As they grow older they don't physically need me as they did when they were little ones, but they still need me.  Now I laugh with them, talk with them, cry with them, and worry about them. In light of Friday's tragedy in Newtown, CT I've been thinking alot about my children and wondering how I would ever get through such an event.

This is the light that we wait for as mother's every year of our children's lives...birthday candles.  They burn bright and mark one more year of amazing memories that we have had with our kids. The candles also allow us to dream and look forward to the future that "baby" will have.  I have noticed that as my kids get older, I'm a little sad at birthday time.  I love the wonderful people that they are growing up to be, but my heart yearns to hold them in my arms and sing a lullaby to them.  Tonight, there are mommas in CT that will never see the light of another birthday candle.  It's hard to contain the sorrow I have for them.
These are the candles that every mother dreads.  A candle to represent the loss of a life.  No more laughter, dreams and hopes.  Replacing them is a grief so heavy and strong that going on seems nearly impossible.  Every breathe and footstep forward in labored and  yet go on you must.  I can't imagine the pain and agony being felt by mommas throughout Newtown, CT tonight.
This is the end of a light....something that should never happen to your children.  My family suffered a tragedy years ago and we buried my 17 yr old nephew.  My heart still grieves for his momma.  And now it grieves again for the momma in Newtown CT. 
And yet, now many years after my nephew's death, a new light burns bright.  Finally, after time, we think of him with smiles and laughter.  Remembering the joy and comedy he brought into our lives.  He is a light that will never be forgotten.  A momma will never forget the loss, but I do believe God lessens the burden and allows for healing.  And when the sorrow gets too heavy it's time to remember that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.....
Those amazing, darling, funny, smiling children will be waiting in heaven for their mommas with arms open wide.  This is the promise of faith in Christ.  So let's hold on to the light we have in our lives and know that He is always with us and His Light will shine FOREVER.
Have a good one,

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